‘Single non-white jacket’: RCMP write personal ad to find lost coat’s owner

A jacket with ‘something valuable’ in pocket was found behind North Vancouver Salvation Army

Single Non-White Jacket Seeks Lost Partner. (North Vancouver RCMP)

North Vancouver police are asking the public to help make a “romantic reunion.”

Police issued a tongue-in-cheek news release Wednesday that looked like a personal ad for a “single non-white jacket.”

“You dropped me off on that rainy night, behind the Salvation Army Thrift Store on Fell Street in North Vancouver,” the release said. “But I think you still miss me. Because you left something valuable behind, in one of my pockets. Not a scarf or pair of socks, but something much more valuable. Maybe you just wanted one last chance to hold me?”

The jacket is described as “broad shouldered and nicely tanned,” with an astrological sign of Virgo, and that it’s seeking a Scorpio who wears a size XL.

“By my guess, you’re over 40 (but you don’t look a day over 29!). You know how to treat a jacket. You never labelled me and I loved you for that. You’re clean, but not a neat-freak.”

The news release writer even goes so far as to describe the jacket’s interests.

“I love long walks on the beach and candle-lit dinners. I’m not sporty, but I’m just as comfortable at a pub as I am at the symphony.

“I’m warm, soft, formal, and low-maintenance. I don’t like labels, so nobody can tell where I’m from. I’m well put together, and have never fallen apart in public. Smooth-chested. No back hair!”

The release does not say when the jacket was discovered, but if you’re the owner, your jacket is “missing you” and you’re asked to contact North Vancouver police at 604-985-1311.



joti.grewal@bpdigital.ca

Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter

Just Posted

BC Bus North service extended to September

Transportation ministers have extended the service, which was set to expire at the end of May

Nisga’a leader named UNBC chancellor

Dr. Joseph Arthur Gosnell is the first Indigenous leader to assume the role

Northwest local governments team up to fill in future employment gaps

Around 17,000 jobs will need to be filled in the region over the next eight years

Poetry month sees launch of “Oona River Poems” at Rupert library

Peter Christensen consciously and lovingly documents our physical and psychological landscapes

Lily Swanson celebrates her 90th birthday in Prince Rupert

The Acropolis Manor resident has 22 grandchildren and is a great grandmother to 25 children

Prince Rupert students share portraits of kindness with children in Peru

The Memory Project gives teens a chance to sharpen their art skills and global awareness

‘B.C. cannot wait for action’: Top doctor urges province to decriminalize illicit drugs

Dr. Bonnie Henry says current approach in ‘war on drugs’ has criminalized and stigmatized drug users

Canfor curtailing operations across B.C.

Low lumber prices and the high cost of fibre are the cause of curtailment

B.C. woman, 76, challenges alcohol-screening laws after failing to give breath sample

Norma McLeod was unable to provide a sample because of her medical conditions

New report on 2017 wildfires calls for better coordination with B.C. First Nations

Tsilhqot’in National Government documents 2017 disaster and lists 33 calls to action

B.C. youth coach banned amid sexual harassment, bullying scandal: Water Polo Canada

Justin Mitchell can’t take part in Water Polo Canada events or clubs

Wilson-Raybould: Feds want to just ‘manage the problem’ of Indigenous Peoples

Former federal justice minister speaks at First Nations Justice Council meeting in B.C.

Haida youth travels to New York for UN forum on Indigenous issues

Haana Edensaw presented her speech in Xaad Kil, Masset dialect of the Haida language

Female real estate agents warned of suspicious man in Metro Vancouver

The man requests to see homes alone with the female agent, police say

Most Read