Good food, fine wine and some intimate conversation: romance is is good for you, according to a Vancouver Island couples’ therapist. Image: Facebook/Quails’ Gate Estate Winery

Romance is more than fun, it’s good for you

Find out not just how to keep those Valentine’s Day fires burning, but why

Romance in a relationship is important, not just on Valentine’s Day but everyday, says registered psychotherapist John Taylor.

Taylor, counsellor at Izumi Therapy in Nanaimo, said making time for a partner is probably the healthiest thing couples can do for their relationship and well-being.

“We talk about the importance of eating healthy and exercising but there’s some research that says 15 minutes of working on your relationship a day would do more for your cardiovascular health than an hour of aerobic activity at the gym because you get rid of all the stress hormones that are so bad for you,” Taylor said.

RELATED: Vancouver Island retailers share the love around Valentine’s Day

Taylor added that romance is something that people should add everyday to their relationship.

“Add as much as you can,” he said.

Taylor said every positive act couples do for each other in a relationship is romance.

“The difference between a romantic relationship and a friendship is that you realize and recognize your partners vulnerabilities and what they need to fill them up and you kind of go that extra level to meet those,” he said.

According to the online blog, Health Fitness Revolution, romantic relationships can be a ticket to good health.

In a post about the connection between health and romance, the author writes that there are chemical processes in the brain that affect how we feel. When we’re with a significant other, the body releases hormones, like oxytocin and dopamine, that signal feelings of trust, pleasure, and reward.

It states that “In one study, researchers found people’s blood pressure was lower when they were with a romantic partner than when they were interacting with anyone else.”

Taylor said one of the best ways to strengthen an emotional connection with a partner is to be an empathetic listener.

“If your partner gets home and says ‘I can’t believe my boss yelled at me, I was five minutes late for work.’ You don’t say, ‘well of course you were late you didn’t get up.’ You have empathy and say ‘that’s really tough tell me about it,’” he said.

If the emotional stuff is working well, Taylor said other aspects in a relationship become easier. He said it’s important to have both sexual and non-sexual connections but that an emotional component should come first.

Valentine’s Day can be a day for couples to be extra romantic, but Taylor said it can also be a difficult day for couples who have little romance in their relationships.

“The expectation is too unrealistic for the day to fix it,” he said. “A good relationship means the job is important and the kids are important but we’re important too. The importance of a couple putting [making time for each other] in their schedule and making time everyday is just as important as getting to work on time,” Taylor said.

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

Just Posted

Talks with hereditary chiefs run into the night

Ministers expected to make statement Saturday morning

Hundreds of Prince Rupert renters evicted

Renovictions in Prince Rupert leaving more than 47 families, 200-plus people in two days, from two different properties without a place to live

Mohawks propose temporary Indigenous police for Wet’suwet’en territory

The RCMP has already committed to ending patrols along a critical roadway

Talks with Wet’suwet’en hereditary chiefs enter second day

Federal and provincial ministers ready to extend discussions

Wet’suwet’en herreditary chiefs meet with provincial, federal ministers

Neither party speaking on the groundwork laid for tomorrow’s talks

UPDATE: Arrests made, tires slashed on patrol cars in northern B.C., says RCMP

But a Gitxsan hereditary chief says 14 were arrested, as fight over natural gas pipeline continues

Toddler killed in Squamish grocery store parking lot

Child’s mother taken to hospital but her condition is not known

Two law enforcement trucks ‘deliberately’ set on fire in northern B.C., RCMP say

Police say they have video evidence of a person in the area of the truck fires

B.C. mother, daughter return home after coronavirus quarantine in Asia

Jensine Morabito and her daughter were on Holland America’s Westerdam but did not catch the virus

Leap Year means we get an extra day in February, so how are you spending it?

People online have a number of suggestions and plans on how they will be spending Saturday

Greta sticker that drew outrage in Alberta not child pornography: RCMP

X-Site Energy Services has denied having anything to do with the stickers

Bald eagle hit by train in northern B.C. has a chance of survival

The raptor has been taken to OWL in the Lower Mainland for recovery

Cheslatta Carrier Nation and Rio Tinto sign a historic agreement

Co-operation crucial to stem dropping Nechako Reservoir level

Most Read